Contents
- Santa: Maine tuje khat likha,fir b tu meri shadi me kyu ni aya? Banta: Mujhe khat nhi mila. Santa: To sale maine likha to tha ki khat mile na mile,ana zaroor h..
- Santa ek Ped Par ulta latka hua tha, Banta: Ulta kyon latke ho, Santa: Maine SIR Dard ki GOLI khai thi, Kahi Pet me na chali jaye.
- Santa :- Oye, Tumne Apni Sagai Kyu Tod Di. Banta:-Arrey, Uska Koi Boyfriend Nahi Tha.! Santa:-Toh.? Banta:-Jo aj Tak Kisi Ki Na Ho Saki Wo Meri Kya Hogi…!
- Boss: Mere liye ek shisha le ke aao Jisme main aapna muh dekh saku Santa : Nahi mila sir Sab shisho par mera hi Muh Dikhay de raha tha.
- Captain of Military: Naujawano, aage bado…
- (Santa aage nahin bada)
- Captain: Tum aage kyun nahin bade?
- Santa: Apne kaha 9 jawanon aage bado, mein 10ve number pe tha 😀
- Santa joined NASA.
- After one month the Americans had to change the name from NASA to SATYANASA !
- Madam – Translate it . Mere sir de Baal , Uud gaye hawa de naal ? Santa rply – Hair of your tind . . have gone with the wind. Ting ting teeding.:-P ~
- In A 1OO Meter Race,It Was Announced 1 2 3 Start… All Started Running Except Santa. Coach:Y R U Still Waiting? Santa: My No. Is 4! B-) ~
- Santa & Banta 8th Me Aathvi Bar FaiL Ho Gye Santa- ChaL Suicide Kar Le Banta- SaaLe PagaL Ho Gya Hai AgLe Janam Fir NURSERY Se Hi Suru Krna Padega 😀
- ~
- Santa: They say, “Milk gives you strength”. Banta: That’s right. Santa: So I drank 5 glasses & still couldn’t move a wall. I tried 6 shots of vodka & saw the wall move by itself!
- ~
- Santa Ne god Se Pucha Kya Mai Agle Janam Me Gadha Ban Sakta Hoon.. God Ne Jawab Diya.. aap iss suvidha ka labh pehle hi le chuke hai.
- Patni: Agr mai kho gayi to tum kya karoge? Santa: Nirml baba ke pas jaunga Patni: Tm kitne achhe ho, kya kahoge unse? Santa: Baba aapki kripa ho gyi
- Salesman-Sir cockroch k liye powder loge kya??? Santa- Nhi,”hm cockroch ko itna laad-pyar nhi krte” “Aaj powder laga dege to kal DEO mangega”
- College ke back side river Me Principal Doob Raha Tha, Usko Tairna Nhi Aata Tha, Santa Ne Dekha Or zor zor Se Chillate Hue bhaaga . . . kal chhutti hai.
- Biology Teacher: Wo kaun h jo aasman me udti hai par bachche zameen pe deti hai? . Santa kuch der sochne k baad? . . . . . . . Air Hostess.!!
- Santa: Sharab pite pite rone laga Banta: Kya hua kyo ro rahe ho? Santa: Yaar ki kara jis ladki ko bhulane k liye pi raha tha,uska naam yaad nhi aa raha hai
- Santa Ko Beta Hua. Use Jyotish Ke Pass Le Gaye Jyotish:Ye Jiska Naam Pehle Bolega Wo mar Jyega Baccha Bola “PAPA” Aur Dusre Din Padosi Mar Gya
- Santa to Banta: Yaar tere ghar se Hamesha Hasne ki Awaz aati hai.. Ye khushi ka Raaz kya hai?
- Banta: Meri BV mujhe Jute marti hai, Lag jaye to wo hasti hai, Na lage to mein hasta hun.
- Santa to Doctor: Dr. Sahab mere upar wale dant ko kida kha rha tha, Aapne niche wala danT kyo nikal dia Doctor: Are pagal niche walE Pe khada ho ke khata tha na.. 😀
- Santa – My Wife Died Yesterday.. I’m Trying To Cry But Tears Are Not Come Out, What To Do? Banta – No Problem. Just Imagine She Came Back. 😀
- Santa gadhe pe baith k college jata tha? 3 saal baad paidal college jane laga? . Socho kyu?? . . . . . . . . . . . Kyoki gadhe ka graduation complete ho gya tha 😀
- Snta-bnta 1dawat me gye. Wahan 1admi ne unse pucha-aap kon? Santa-main ladke walo ki side se Banta-or main ladki walo ki side se Admi- kutto yhan to 13vi hai.
- Santa Bijli office phone kar ke bola: Light band kar do . . Bijli wala : kyu Sir ? . . Santa : Wo yaar mere dimag me ek nayi mast wali gaali aai hai, wo tum ko deni hai
- Tchr- How many planets r there? Santa- Mercury, Venus, Jupiter, etc. Tchr- Aur batao? Santa- Aur bas sab badhiya! upper wale ki kripa hai ab Aap sunao…!!
- Santa eating kadi chawl….sudenly ek makhi aake khane pe beth jati hai Santa – arey kitni bholi hai tu.. Ye wo nai hai jo tu samjh rahi hai.. Chall udd…!
- Passenger-Tumne Mere Jeb Me Hath Q Dala? Santa-Muje Machis Chahiye Thi. Pasen-Tum Mujhse Mang Sakte The. Santa-Me Ajnabi Se Baat Nhi Karta.
- Santa-babaji mujhe koi aisa kaam batao jisme log apna kaam khud kare aur paise mujhe de. Babaji-tum sulabh shauchalay main naukari kar lo.
- Santa says: “Duniya Ka hr Insan Apne Paav Bhigoye Bina shayad Samundar to Par kr skta h, Lekin Ankhe Bhigoe Bina “Pyar” nhi Kr sakta. Aaj Santa serious hai.
- Santa ne cooking contest me part lia aur khali bartan me chammach firane laga.. JUDGE: “Kya bana rahe ho?” . . . . . . . . . Santa: CHUTIYA!:D
- Santa Ko Raat Me Cigrette Pine Ka Man Kia. Sb Trf Machis Dhunda Pr Kahi Nhi Mila Akhir Me Nirash Ho K Candle Bujha Ke So Gya…
- Aurato se bhari bus ka accident ho gya Sari ladies mar gyi. sbke pati 1-1 ghnte roye Santa akela pura din roya.. Q ?! Qki uski patni ki bus mis ho gyi thi !!
- Customer-Teri dukan to mithai ki hai. Tera dil khane ko nahi karta? Santa-Bahut karta hai par Papa rasgulle gin k jate hain isliye sirf choos k rakh deta hoon.
- Santa: Senior aur Junior me kya farak hota hai?? @ Banta: Very simple, jo samundar k paas rahe wo “sea near” aur jo chidiya ghar ke paas rahe wo “zoo near”.
- Santa ki Mout Bijli Girne se hui, Pr unki Lash Muskurate hui mili. GOD ne pucha-Mrte wqt Hans Q rha tha Santa-Oye Mainu laga koi Foto khich rha hai..
- Santa Hotel Me Khali Katori Me Roti Dubo K Kha Raha Tha Waiter:Ye kaise Kha Rhe Ho? Santa: I’m a Maths Student DAAL Maine Supose Ki Hui Hai.:>
- Santa ki amma mar gayi. 1 aadmi bola-amma mujhe bhi le jati 2-4aur bole-amma hume bhi le jati Santa bola-Chup ho jao salo.amma kya TATA SUMO karke gyi hai.
- Santa teachr ban gya. Usne exam ke liye Ques. Paper banaya.. Paper dekhte hi sare bachche behosh ho gaye .. Questns r – 1. China kis Desh me hai ? 2. 15 Aug kis Date ko Aati hai ? 3. Green Rang kis Colour ka Hota hai ? 4. Tamatar ko Hindi may kya Bolte hai ? 5. Mumtaz ki Qabar main Kon Dafan hai?
- God: Beta kya chahiye? Santa: 1 Job, 1 badi si gadi aur usme dher sari ladkiyan. God: Tathastu.! Aj Santa Girls School me bus driver hai!!:;)
- SANTA-Hathi Ko Sui Ke Chhed Me Se Guzrne Se Kaise Roka Ja Sakta Hai.? . . . . BANTA- . . . Aasan Hai Uski Punch Me Gaanth Laga Do.-
- Santa was making his BIODATA ! He didn’t know what to write for “Zodiac sign” He checked Banta’s, who had written “Cancer” He thought & then wrote “PILES”
- Santa ki Beti: Papa Kal Apke Gharse 1 Member Kam Ho Jayega, Next Day Santa Ki Beti Bhag Gayi. Santa: Ladki Ne Kaam To Galat Kiya, Par Thi Wo “JYOTISH”.:p
- Santa2Banta: Santa- Ye TV Ka Rate Kya He? Salesman- 1 Lakh Rs. S- Wht Is Special? S.M- Light Chali Jaye To Automatic Off Ho Jayega. S- Oho, Pack Kar do.
- Hindi grammar Teacher: wo ladki sab ladko se hans kr baat karti h. Batao is sentence me ladki kya hai? Santa: Sir, ladki bigdi hui h. Or Setting krna chahti h..
- Santa ne cafe me 1 ldki se I LUV U kaha Ldki ne mara chata or boli “kya bola” toh Santa ROTE HUE bola Jb suna nhi tune to chata kyu mara. 😀
- Tchr-jo mere agle sawal ka jawab dega, wo ghar ja sakta he. Tabhi santa apna bag bahar fek deta he. Tchr-wo bag kisne feka? Santa-Mene, Ab me ghar ja rha hu..:
- SanTa Ne 1 Car Li Loan Pe Loan NaHi CHuKa PaNeSe BaNKWaLe Car UTHa Le GaYe – SanTa RoTe HuYe: PeHLe PaTa HoTa To, SHaaDi BHi Loan Le K KarTa
- Santa: 1 aurat ko ghurte hue ja raha tha, Aurat:’dekhta kya h teri maa ki umar ki hu’ Santa: to mai bhi apne baap k liye hi dhund raha hu…!
- Santa ne blade se grlfrnd ka naam haath pr likha 2min baad jor-2 se rone lga. Banta-Kya hua,Q ro rha hai? Snta-Behenchod LADO likhna tha,galti se LODA likh gya
- Santa Walking On Road Samne Gobar Pada Tha Santa Ne Jhuk Kar Ungli Dal Kar Taste Kia Aur Bola: Oh! Ye To Gobar H,Shukr Hai Mera Pair Nai Pada
- Santa ne apni car ke niche Kutte ko sota hua dekha, To kutte ki taang pakad ke Bahar kicha aur bola- Bahar nikal kutte, Bada aaya Automobile Enginneer
- Captan-naujawano age bado. santa age nhi badha.. Captan-tum aage kyu nhi bade..??? Santa-aapne kaha nau jawano age bado..bt me to 10 no.pr khada tha..!!.
- Santa: Apne School ki sunata hu ek Prem Kahani, Ek Topper thi ladki jo thi Percentge ki Rani. Fir . Fir Fir Kya? Humne Fasali..aur Fail Karadi
- Dost: Biwi se Jhagda Solve hua kya? Santa: Ghutno pe Chal k Aayi thi Mere Paas. Dost: Kya Boli? Santa: Boli Palang k Neeche se Nikal Aao, Ab Nahi Maarungi.
- Dost: Biwi se Jhagda Solve hua kya? Santa: Ghutno pe Chal k Aayi thi Mere Paas. Dost: Kya Boli? Santa: Boli Palang k Neeche se Nikal Aao, Ab Nahi Maarungi.
- 1 bar Santa paise jma krane Bank gya Officer-Ye note fta h dusra do Santa-Mai apne A/c me jma kr rha hu, fta karu ya Nya, Tuje kya matlab h be.. Tu apna kam kr..?;-)
- Santa apne beemar baap se-papa apko marne ke baad dafnaya jaye ya jalaya jaye? papa- beta mujhse na pucho,mujhe surprise dena..
- Santa: bhai sahab time kya hua? Man: sham k 6 baje hai! Santa: sala subah se pooch raha hu. Sab alag alag time bta rahe h.
- SANTA went to Court. JUDGE- “Order ! Order !” SANTA- “1 Pizza, 2 Dosa, 3 Idli & 1 Cold-drink !” JUDGE- “Shut Up !” SANTA- “No, No… 7-Up !!”
- “Santa: Why are u heating the knife? Banta: So that I dont get infection while committing suicide!”.
- Saniya Mirza- muje tennis k bare me sb knowledge he kuch b puch lo sb bta dungi Santa-achcha to btao tennis k net me kitne chhed hote h.
- Teacher:Ek din Aisa Ayega Jab Prithvi Par Pani Nahi Rahega, Jeev Jantu Nasht ho Jayenge,Prithvi tabaah ho Jayegi. Santa: Sir,kya hmari Us din Chutti hogi..??
- Santa=kanjus dost se bach kr raho. Banta=magr kanjus dost ka pta kaise chalega. Santa=simple, saare dosto ko msg karo jo reply na de samjah lo wo hi kanjus hai.
- Santa 1st time plen me baitha: plane ka agla tyre upar utha, santa pilot ko marne laga. Or bola:me pehle hi dara hua hu or tu stunt maar raha h.
- Santa Hotel Me Khali Katori Me Roti Dubo K Kha Raha Tha Waiter:Ye kaise Kha Rhe Ho? Santa: I’m a Maths Student DAAL Maine Supose Ki Hui Hai.:>
- Santa : Shirt ke liye ek accha kapda dikhaiye. Salesman : plain mein dikhau? Santa : nahin helicopter mein dikha , ghade Bandar se muh k.. Yahin pe dikha.:):D
- Gr8 words of two gr8 persons: I may walk slowly bt, I nvr walk backwards -Abraham Lincoln I dn’t need 2 walk bcoz, I have a scooter -SANTA….
- After Eating Fish Santa Dont Drink WaterY Coz He Feared That Fish WillStart Swimming In His Stomach:D
- Santa: Main 1 baar raat ko susu krne gya, To maine dekha Toilet me SHER tha. Banta:Fir kya hua? Santa:Fir kya, Maine SHER ko kaha aap krlo meri to nikal gayi
- Santa Public toilet gaya aur 1 Ghante baad nikla bahar baitha Jamadaar bola 20 rupe Santa- abe Toilet me baitha tha, ‘Cyber Cafe’ me nhi..
- Santa Calls Up White House Santa- I Want To Be D Next President Of USA. Obama – Are You Idiot? Santa-No, Is It Compulsory?:D
- In a party Santa asked a girl : ” Tusi Dance Karoge ” : Ladki khadi hokar : ” Haan karoongi ” : Santa : ” To mai ye kursi le lu ? ? ? 🙂
- Santa-Dr. Sahab Plastic Surgery Me Kitna Kharcha Ayega? Dr-50 hazar S: Agar Plastic Hum De To Dr(Gusse Me)-Sale Pighla Kar Chipka Bhi Lena
- Santa Ki Taange Nili Ho Gyi. Dr-Zeher h Kaatni Padegi Taang Kaat K nakli Lgai 2 Din Baad-nakli Taange b Nili Dr:Ab Bimari Smj Ayi JEANS Rang chhodti hai 🙂
- Teacher- cow hamari mata hai.. (school k bahr 1 cow road pe ghum ri thi) Santa- sir..sir..Bahar apki mummy awara Sando k sath ghum rai hai!.
- An astronomer was watching the sky through telescope. Santa was observing him. Suddenly a star falls, seeing that Santa shouted: Kya nishana lagaya hai
- Heights of Friendship:- Santa commiting suicide, someone asked the reason. He said: My Wife ran with my Friend and I can’t live without my Friend..
- Banta-tu kabhi kisi shok-sabha me gya hai? Santa-ha yar,bade batmiz log aate hai waha, me 2 ghante baitha pr kisi ne mujse haske baat tak nahi ki..
- BV ne kurti utari, sexy nazar se Santa ki traf dekhte huye salwar b utar k boli-“Pata he na, kya krna he? Santa: go to hell, Mai raat ko kapde nhi dhounga..
- Santa: Janu Coka-Cola Peene k Bad Kuch Karney Ko Dil Chah Raha h? wife: (Sharmate Hue) Karo Jee..! Santa: BrrrRrrrRrrrRrrrRrrrRrrr…
- SANTA-Hathi Ko Sui Ke Chhed Me Se Guzrne Se Kaise Roka Ja Sakta Hai.? . . . . BANTA- . . . Aasan Hai Uski Punch Me Gaanth Laga Do.-
- Santa ne apni Bhabhi ko jaan se mar diya. Logo n pucha q mara.? Santa-Main jb b apne dosto se puchhta tha ki kis se baat kr rhe ho wo yahi kahte teri BHABHI se.
- Santa – Phone pe itni dhimi aawaz me kisse bat kr rhe ho?? Banta-Bahan hai.! Santa-To fir itni dhimi aawaz me kis liye.? Banta -Teri hai.!
- 1st time in HISTORY Santa ne 1 Intelligent sawal pucha & master behosh. Sawal=BLACK is colour WHITE is also a colour But BLACK & WHITE TV is not COLOUR TV. WHY?
- Teacher: kaamyabi kya hoti hai.? SANTA :- Kaamyabi “Potty” ki smell ki tarah hoti hai ..Bardasht tabhi hoti hai… . . Jab Apni ho….: samjhe yaaro….
- Santa,Sali Se: Teri Didi Busy Hai,Tu Baby ko Dudh Pila de Sali-Mujhe dudh nahi ata Santa-Kamaal hai Display to bada JABARDAST hai stock kuch nahi…
- santa: train mai raat bhar neend nhi ayi, uppar ki seat mili,garmi thi! Banta: to exchnge kar leta! santa: kisse krta neeche ki seat pr koi aya he nhi.
Santa: Maine tuje khat likha,fir b tu meri shadi me kyu ni aya?
Banta: Mujhe khat nhi mila.
Santa: To sale maine likha to tha ki khat mile na mile,ana zaroor h..
Santa ek Ped Par ulta latka hua tha,
Banta: Ulta kyon latke ho,
Santa: Maine SIR Dard ki GOLI khai thi, Kahi Pet me na chali jaye.
Santa :- Oye, Tumne Apni Sagai Kyu Tod Di.
Banta:-Arrey, Uska Koi Boyfriend Nahi Tha.!
Santa:-Toh.?
Banta:-Jo aj Tak Kisi Ki Na Ho Saki Wo Meri Kya Hogi…!
Boss: Mere liye ek shisha le ke aao
Jisme main aapna muh dekh saku
Santa : Nahi mila sir
Sab shisho par mera hi Muh
Dikhay de raha tha.
Captain of Military: Naujawano, aage bado…
(Santa aage nahin bada)
Captain: Tum aage kyun nahin bade?
Santa: Apne kaha 9 jawanon aage bado, mein 10ve number pe tha 😀
Santa joined NASA.
After one month the Americans had to change the name from NASA to SATYANASA !
Madam – Translate it .
Mere sir de Baal ,
Uud gaye hawa de naal ?
Santa rply –
Hair of your tind . .
have gone with the wind.
Ting ting teeding.:-P
~
In A 1OO Meter Race,It Was Announced
1
2
3
Start…
All Started Running Except Santa.
Coach:Y R U Still Waiting?
Santa: My No. Is 4! B-)
~
Santa & Banta 8th Me Aathvi Bar FaiL Ho Gye
Santa- ChaL Suicide Kar Le
Banta- SaaLe PagaL Ho Gya Hai
AgLe Janam Fir NURSERY Se Hi Suru Krna Padega 😀
~
Santa: They say, “Milk gives you strength”.
Banta: That’s right.
Santa: So I drank 5 glasses & still couldn’t move
a wall.
I tried 6 shots of vodka & saw the wall move by
itself!
~
Santa Ne god Se Pucha
Kya Mai Agle Janam Me
Gadha Ban Sakta Hoon..
God Ne Jawab Diya.. aap iss suvidha ka labh pehle hi le chuke hai.
~
Patni: Agr mai kho gayi to tum kya karoge?
Santa: Nirml baba ke pas jaunga
Patni: Tm kitne achhe ho, kya kahoge unse?
Santa: Baba aapki kripa ho gyi
~